complications of my mind.

1423220420, originally uploaded by rachel.flubbz.

i wanna run away.
away from you. away from me. away from people. away from life.

i was the one who declined your offer and yet i'm upset.
can't you just step up and say you'll take me?
i would rather not be given a choice.
i only took it because i felt bad for taking up your time when you don't have enough already.
i felt bad making you take extra trips which also meant more money spent on petrol when you're already pretty broke.
i felt like i'm a burden to you.

i don't know. i'm just really upset. really really upset.
you affect me a lot. so much that it's so annoying.

but everything is happening in my own head.
my mind is waging a war with my emotions.

i don't want to be alone.
please don't leave me here by myself.
i can't take it anymore.
i feel so lonely that i'm going rather mad.
i tried focusing totally on my work but i can't.
i need people. i need the girls. most of all, i need you.

i hate being needy. i hate this feeling.
but i can't deny it.

i can't handle this. no i can't.